I keep seeing these posts on Facebook about giving "Things to do in your 20's" or "10 things to stop doing to yourself" and "100 things I will teach my children" and I started to wonder if I had any words of advice. I'm in my early 30's now, so I've lived long enough to make mistakes and have some triumphs. So, here are a few things I've learned:
Don't forget to laugh
Seriously. It is a scientific fact that laughter is essential to life. In my experience, you need to have at least one friend or family member that you can laugh with until you cry. I have several friends that I am able to laugh with about the most random things like the doge meme, Winnie the Pooh or being dead in the sewer. It doesn't matter that most people wouldn't find these things funny, what matters is finding humor in everyday things, no matter how random. It is so easy to get caught up in the seriousness of life, especially once you start doing grown up things like going to college, having children or having a full time job. If you're not careful, these things can rob you of your laughter and that robs you of your joy. Laugh until you cry. I swear you'll sleep better at night for it.
Travel alone at least once in your life
For most people, this is a terrifying thought. I'm not saying that you have to take a long trip to a foreign country alone and enjoy every second of it. Do something simple like go to a movie alone and then move up from there. Go on a day trip by yourself and see what happens. You'd be amazed at how different a trip can be when you're alone. I've driven across the country by myself twice, gone on day trips alone and traveled for work alone a few times. These trips are so different for the simple fact that I notice things I wouldn't have if someone had been with me. I meet new friends EVERY TIME I GO SOMEWHERE ALONE. No joke, every time I've gone on a trip or even gone to a concert alone, I have left with a good story. I highly recommend this one.
Once you get used to traveling alone you may be ready to....
Get your own place
I understand that this may not be a possibility for a lot of people. Either you got married young or had children young so they're going to be living with you. If you have the opportunity to do so, I definitely recommend getting your own place, even if it's just for a year. It's amazing how awesome it is to have your own space that you get to occupy by yourself. When I lived in my own apartment in Providence, I loved it. My apartment was really cute and I knew that the mess was mine alone. It is such a great feeling!
Try to achieve huge goals, even if it doesn't work out
This one is hard, because it always hurts to feel like you've failed at something. It's all in how you look at it though. When I left Utah, I moved to Rhode Island. It was literally the farthest I could go from Utah and I did it because I wanted to be a Marine Biologist. I ended up going to the University of Rhode Island for a year and majored in Marine Biology. Did I finish? Am I a Marine Biologist now? No. But that doesn't mean I failed either. I learned so much that year and had amazing experiences I never thought I would. I gave it a shot and that's more than a lot of people can say. At least I will never wonder what would happen if I tried...
Don't be afraid to look different
If you want a tattoo, get a tattoo! If you've always wanted to have crazy hair, DO IT! The best I ever looked (in my mind) was the summer that I had my nose pierced, purple highlights in my hair and got a tattoo on my wrist. If you're avoiding things like this just because of where you MAY work one day, stop. I'm not saying to go get a tattoo on your face but you can get a tattoo and hide it if you need to. I've had my wrist tattoo since 2009 and most people never notice I even have it. I wear long sleeves or a bracelet that hides it at work but the rest of the time I show it. I love it. I don't care if no one else in the world likes it, I got it for a reason and I haven't regretted it once. Don't be afraid to be your authentic self.
It's ok to go back to school later in life, or not at all
When I left college after one semester when I was 18, I felt really guilty. I was scared that I was letting my parents down and that I was a failure in life. Guess what? School isn't for everyone! I needed a break after high school. I didn't go back to school for seven years but I DID go back. I always knew I eventually wanted to. Not everyone needs to go to college though and that's ok. Don't let anyone tell you it has to look a certain way. Do whatever works for you. I'm about to apply for Law School in my early 30's. Maybe I will get in and go back to school for another four years. Maybe I won't. Either way, it will be good and things will work out. School isn't everything.
Finally,
Most of your life you won't even remember, so don't dwell on what went wrong
Seriously, think about the last year of your life or even the last month. How much of that time do you remember vividly? Sure, there was probably a fun vacation or you graduated college or maybe you had a baby. Those are all big things and you will remember a lot of details about those times, but how much do you remember about every day? Most of the time we get into a routine and eventually, most days seem the same, with no significant differences, for years at a time. It's nice to feel settled and get into a routine where you're content and life isn't crazy. Don't let the mistakes and bad things that happen take over your memories though, or this is all you will remember in your life. I have been blessed with a pretty detailed memory in general. I remember birthdays (without Facebook reminding me) and details about events that most people forget rather quickly. I try to relive those memories as much as possible so that I will always have those amazing memories. It's not that I want to forget the mistakes, it's that I want to learn from them and move on.
So that's my advice! Take it or leave it. I just hope I was able to make you think. :)
